Sunday, August 28, 2011

...Carrie Bradshaw Part 2

Perhaps every single woman who moves to New York is in some way influenced by Sex and the City. Whether she likes the show or not, it is so culturally pervasive that comparison is unavoidable. While I know that the show is escapist and while I often have problems with the way it deals with gender I wondered…

What could I learn from Carrie Bradshaw and her friends?

I awoke on Tuesday at 10am. As soon as my eyes opened, I first thought about the bad dream I had had and then realized I had overslept, not moved my friend's car, and now had a $40 ticket. That explained the bad dream. I rolled out of bed, threw on some jeans and went to check on the car. Sure enough there was a $45 ticket.

When life gives you tickets, throw a ticker tape parade.

Or, in my case, come home, write a check for $45 and get back in your boxers to write. Determined to have a fabulous week, I put on my Carrie-esque attitude and thought about how I could spin this minor calamity. Sure I was out of $45, but I saved myself 30 minutes of driving around looking for a spot and I wouldn't have to move that car again until Friday.

The car taken care of I had time to focus on the goals I had set for myself on Monday.I had given myself the task of participating in 5 fabulous activites and one presented itself on Tuesday night. New York's hottest restaurant (at some point) is (was) Blue Fin. A co-worker’s wife waits tables at the restaurant and invited everyone in the office to come out for $5.90 mixed drinks in honor of the 5.9 earthquake that had hit (nudged, really) New York that afternoon. The drinks were usually $14 and Carrie Bradshaw would certainly never miss an opportunity for a fabulous drink, so I accepted. One discounted Lotus Flower later, my friend was bringing us complimentary champagne, an espresso cocktail and the dessert menu (on the house). My $5.90 drink turned into a feast.

Lesson #1: Never turn down an opportunity for fabulous freebies

Stunned by how opulent my treatment was at Blue Fin (most of it for free) I was happy to practice Lesson 2

And Lesson #2: Tip fabulously

Lesson #3 came when I finally checked something off my emotional to do list. A toxic ex had been trying to reconnect over facebook and after a couple messages it was clear that absolutely nothing had changed. I decided to end it (again). My message was concise and above the fray. I was satisfied. Within 30 minutes he had written back. His response was petty, mean and completely unnecessary. My message was final, but I guess he just had to have the last word. So, I defriended him on facebook. If this were tennis, the score would be 40-love.

Lesson #3: End toxic relationships, to make room for new ones.

One of my Sex and the City goals from Monday was to dress fabulously all week.  My go-to outfit is usually a pair of jeans and a cute tee shirt. There would be none of that this week. I would construct my image. No throwing things on. Instead I would savor cut, color, texture… I would plumb my wardrobe for fabulous pieces and pair them in interesting ways…and I did! Tuesday, I wore my cream Kenneth Cole blouse, army green shorts and big floral ring. Wednesday was this pink, beaded top with jeans and a low slung belt…ok the truth that was Thursday’s outfit. No rememberance of what I wore Wednesday and the fabulous flew out the window end of week…BUT I did learn…

Lesson #4: Clothes do no good hanging in the closet.

I realized that I have all these pieces that I’m saving for nicer occasions. Like what? Why not wear and enjoy my more interesting clothes. It felt good to get compliments this week. I felt comfortable eating in Blue Fin in my dressier get up and I didn’t spill a drop of food on anything! So why not wear my clothes? Why leave them nice and spotless and going out of style in the closet?

I did get a hair cut this week. I did wear heels (now counts, right? Cause that’s it.) and I did identify a Miranda and a Charlotte for myself. I may know a Samantha, but we never hang out… And brunch at my favorite crepe place today was tasty.

Plot- wise, this week was chock full. I survived an earthquake, a hurricane and the toxic spill from my ex. I had a great week at work, went to a late night faux wrestling themed, improv comedy battle, and spent 36 hours having a co-ed sleepover with friends. My “Charlotte” put her cat to sleep. My “Miranda” contrasted my story arc, with her breast feeding challenges. My Grandad took a turn for the worse (for all that SATC deals with, it rarely touches family). Through all of it, I carried my most important lesson:

Lesson #5: Listen to your own narrator.

I started this week asking myself, how I could best be Carrie Bradshaw. After setting cosmetic goals of wearing heels and being fabulous I immediately realized that I would never be exactly like Carrie, never wanted to be exactly like Carrie and had no desire to beat myself about failing in my Carrie-ness. (Recognizing what I want and who I am... Huh. How very Carrie.) So, I who never wears heels... I, who quite often goes 3 months celebate (gasp!) I learned the greatest lesson that the show has to offer:

This, above all, to thine own self be shoe true.

1 comment: